In school you learn that a typical conversation in English sounds like:

            “Good morning! How are you today?”

            “I’m very good, thank you, and you?”

            “I’m well. Thank you for asking.”

When was the last time you had a conversation like that with an Irish person? Never?

Maybe instead you’ve heard Corkonians greet each other like this:

            “How’s it goin’, boy?”

            “Nothin’ strange. How’s things?”

            “Alright, alright.”

Conversations with real English speakers are usually filled with slang and can be very confusing. This article is a guide to understand how native speakers ask for help, how they say ‘yes’ and ‘no’, and the strange ways they say ‘hello’ and ‘good-bye’ to each other!

At work perhaps your boss has asked you to do something in the traditional way, such as “Could you do me a favour and clean the dishes?” or “Would you mind helping that customer?”  Both are polite ways to ask for help.  To use them yourself, say “Could you do me a favour and…” and follow with a verb and an object. (“Could you do me a favour and show me how to use this machine?”) Or follow “Would you mind….” with an ‘–ing’ verb, such as “Would you mind posting these letters for me, please"

A confusing way that the Irish ask for help, however, is by using the phrase, “You’d never …..would you?”  For example, when someone at the dinner table says “You’d never pass the salt, would you?” they are saying “Please pass the salt” in a more polite way. You can try this out yourself with sentences such as, “You’d never help me take out the rubbish, would you?” or “You’d never open the window for me, would you?” However, it is very important to say this correctly because if it is said wrong, it sounds like you are annoyed or mad!  (For example, if you say “You never open the window,” it means that you are unhappy because the person doesn’t open windows.  If you say “You’d never open the window, would you?” it means you are asking for help!)  Remember to pronounce the ‘d’ strongly in ‘You’d’ and also to have a smile on your face!

Saying ‘yes’ to a request for help is quite easy to do. “No problem,” yes” or “OK” is always clear. Saying ‘no’ to a request for help, however, is not very easy to do politely!  If your boss has given you too much work again, try using some of these phrases to say ‘no.’ 

            Boss:  “Can you clean twenty rooms in the next hour?”

            You:    “I’m really sorry, but I don’t think I have the time for twenty. How about

7?”

or-

            Boss: “Can you work from 8 AM to 8 PM tomorrow?”

            You:    “I wish I could, but I’ve got other things I have to do at home!”

When your boss is making your work too difficult or too long, try saying ‘no’ by using phrases like “I’m really sorry, but…”, “I don’t think I have enough time,” or “I wish I could help, but that’s not possible for me.”

The greetings and ‘good-byes’ of native speakers can also be extremely difficult to understand! Instead of “Hi, how are you?” they often say “Hiya! How’s it going?”,  “How’s things?”, “How are you doing?” or “Alright?”  These all simply mean “How are you?” and you can answer by saying “Good!”, “Grand!” (which means “Very Good”), “OK”, or “Not so good!” (on a bad day).

You may also hear phrases like “What’s up?”, “Any news?”, or “What you been up to?” which all mean that the speaker wants to know what has been happening in your life.  If you have nothing interesting to tell them, you can simply say “Nothing much,” or “Nothing strange.”  These phrases mean, “My life is normal at the moment! Nothing new has happened to me.”

Also, you may have noticed that when you want to pay for something in a shop, the shop assistant says, “You alright?” or “Alright?”  Strangely, this really means “I am ready to help you,” but doesn’t mean they want to know if you are OK. When a shop assistant says “Alright?”, all you have to say is give them what you want to pay for!

When it comes time to say “goodbye” to a native English speaker, you are unlikely to hear the word “goodbye”.  More often, the Irish say, “See ya”, “See ya later”, “Look after yourself”, “Take care”, “Good luck,” “So long,” or “Talk to ya”.  These all mean ‘goodbye’ or ‘I hope I will see you again soon.’ (And ‘ya’ means ‘you’.) When you end a conversation, be sure to use one of these phrases and you’ll get a surprised smile from your English-speaking friend!